45 People Who Don’t Need To Be Told Twice

I feel that this warning label could just be slapped across life in general! Wow, that joke was actually a lot more depressing than intended...

In my experience, all geese are aggressive! Have you ever met a goose in your life that wasn't honking and trying to bite you? Didn't think so!

Penrith has a real problem with people being fellated by passing trains. It's a weird place with even weirder customs.

Wait, so people are getting fellated by vacuums as well now? First trains and now this, what is the world coming to?

Never come in between a person and their fabric scissors. I mean, if they're insane enough to need fabric scissors, then they're capable of anything.

I wonder how many times that he heard this today before he had to resort to putting this sign up.

I know that there is a funny and important message right there, but it is telling that all I can focus on the Magners and Doritos sour cream and chive dip. That's the making of a great night in right there.

Imagine if the cause of your death was being crushed by a falling deer. You really wouldn't be able to look anyone in the eye in the afterlife due to the embarrassment.

Now that is a pretty cool tattoo! I can't help but hear Eric Idle singing the theme tune to the sitcom "One Foot In The Grave" when I look at it though.

I like to think that this cat has realized its mistake and will never do this again; but, if I know cats, then I know that it will be five minutes before this cat gets itself back into this same situation.

Can you imagine if you accidentally sent this message to the wrong seat? Just some little old man getting this out of nowhere.

Regardless of whether I believed in rebirth or not, I wouldn't fancy dying by being mauled to pieces by a tiger. I feel like that would sting a bit.

I only need to be in the sun for 5 seconds before my pale-as-hell skin goes to this color. Thank God for factor 50+ sunscreen!

The person who made these jeans clearly never got over that one scene in There's Something About Mary. Does anyone else get that reference?

It's important to have an appropriate source of inspiration to keep you going when you're trying to quit smoking, and that source of inspiration can also be to do it out of spite! Whatever gets you through!

Jesus, I wonder what the other 145 STDs are out there in the wild. Also, why did they have to ruin Pokemon? Just say "Don't get these STDs etc..." I don't think the inclusion of a Pokemon theme is going to help.

This a pretty clear indication of who your kid values most in the house. Also, I love how the cat is just looking befuddled by the whole situation.

Looks like they're going to be having Diablo sauce on absolutely everything for the time being!

I really don't think that this is going to help get the religious folks in; however, it is certainly an interesting business model for a bible store to go after the atheist market, very novel indeed!

I think that the picture does a lot of the translating work for you if you're struggling. They really pumped the gas on this warning label, didn't they?

Oh Google, there'll be no avoiding paying this... not that I am in any way suggesting that Google avoids paying anything else.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and assume that the person who left this note is no longer the "favorite son" for the foreseeable future.

Although, if he's a good enough juggler to do it drunk, then I'd still give him a round of applause.

I mean, the lesson is probably to keep the nip in a safe, because that cat is seeing sound now and has zero regrets.

I mean, come on! That is just asking for trouble! I can imagine this has lead to a lot of embarrassing trips to buy carrots in the past.

You shouldn't need telling twice to show your mother how much she means to you! Get out there and buy some "Thanks for wiping my butt" flowers today!

If you want your teeth to shine and to lose a lot of feeling in your gums and mouth then this is the toothpaste for you!

I mean... I find this hilarious, but then again I also have the sense of humor of a 50-year-old Dad.

The first rule of any tech problem is to turn it off and turn it back on again.

How cheap do you have to be to go to the trouble of digging up a neighbors' garden rather than buying your own or taking the time to grow your own from seedlings?

This is a well-meaning warning, but something about the silly font makes it feel a bit insulting.

I can only imagine how annoying it must get to constantly be told something obvious about yourself.

Natural selection is a harsh mistress. One other service employee shared this story:

"I work fast food, and the other day we had a lady come up and complain that she burned her finger on her grilled cheese because it was hot. None of us knew how to break the news to her that a grilled cheese is supposed to be hot."

Apparently, this is a common problem at truck stops. Now, I understand that sometimes you've got to go and there isn't a safe place to stop for a while, but if you're going to piss in a bottle, then it's your job to dispose of it properly.

That third question is 1000% a mood.

Never trust a sibling with an unflattering pic.

Uno is the game that teaches younger kids how to lose spectacularly. And once they've come to terms with that, it's time for parents to introduce them to Monopoly.

Why do people feel the need to destroy snowmen?

This person learned their lesson when it turned out that the homeowners used a large stump as a base for the snow sculpture.

I mean... it would probably do the job and the 10-year-old would never realize.

There's nothing that cats love more than being moved out of their comfort zone. They're really professional about it.

This is definitely a situation where spare keys in a safe location are a must!

They must have eaten something spectacularly unusual to have to resort to using anti-bacterial wipes to clean themselves!

If we've told that guy once, we've told him a million times. It is not okay to burst through people's walls out of nowhere, that's how you can end up on a register.

What did Murphy do to the appetizers that required being locked in a room away from the guests this time around?

My immediate response is to think that this cam is terribly evil. However, I also can't help but think that this is the kind of thing that I would do as a joke when I was a kid!