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Petty Revenge Stories I Can't Stop Reading

From the time we're young children, we're taught not to retaliate when someone harms us. That it's divine to turn the other cheek and try and resolve things peacefully.

What. A. Crock. That might work well in Hallmark movies, but in the real world — there's no substitute for sweet revenge! Have a look below and check out these incredible stories of petty revenge that I literally can't stop reading.

Keep your toothbrush under lock and key.

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"My now ex-husband told me when he wanted a divorce that I wasn't worth fighting for. This was right before he left me penniless borrowing money for food. He didn't leave for two weeks and got pissed when I wasn't still doing his laundry. I cleaned the toilet with his toothbrush." - Buzzfeed/sixthtryatadamnusername

Here, kitty kitty...

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Reddit user pellik once had a neighbor (not on her street) call the police because of an old abandoned firepit she had in the backyard. To get back at him, she decided to plant 5000 catnip seeds in his backyard and superglue his wipers to the windshield.

This sounds borderline illegal...

"Guy in an El Camino was aggressively tailgating me in the slow lane. On the highway. Traffic was light so he could have passed easily. I’m in a SUV. I see metal debris in the road ahead of me. I know I can clear it and do. He wasn’t so lucky." - Reddit u/unknown

This is why you should be nice to everyone.

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Back when Redditor madogvelkor was still in school, a bully broke their umbrella. Later on that day, madogvelkor went outside to the bike rack and removed the pin from the bully's bike seat.

Taking back what's mine.

Unsplash | Erol Ahmed

"Went to a restaurant for brunch. Upon receiving my bill I noticed a $3 charge for table linen. As I was leaving I folded up the tablecloth. The waiter said what are you doing? I said, I paid for it I’m taking it home. And I did." - Reddit u/pierced7

Petty squabbles are for the birds.

Reddit user otefl had a falling out with an old roommate. While they were away on vacation, otefl would cover the roommate's car every day in birdseed. After the roommate arrived back home, the birds wouldn't leave her car alone.

At what point does revenge become psychological warfare?

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"We had a coworker/manager who was obnoxious in a dozen different ways. she hated bananas and couldn't stand the smell of old peels, so a group of petty minions made it our mission to make sure there was a fresh banana peel in every trash can in the office, every day." - Reddit u/sleepingbeardune

He literally thought something had died in the walls.

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Reddit user JessicaMessica found out that her live-in boyfriend was cheating on her. Before moving out, she crawled under his bed, cut a hole in the mattress, and stuffed it with old potatoes.

I bet she regrets that decision.

"My husband, as a small child in school, was sick and the teacher wouldn't let him go to the bathroom to throw up, so he went to her desk (where she was sitting) and threw up all over that instead." - Reddit u/puppypoet

Everything is cool when you're part of a team!

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Redditor penguinloveaffair says that her boyfriend is an avid Lego collector. One time, after a bad fight, she went into his room and removed all the heads from his Lego figurines. She didn't give them back until he'd properly apologized.

Question everything.

Unsplash | Victória Kubiaki

"My wife turned off the TV, wrote "broken" on a piece of paper taped to the TV, shut off the power strip, and flipped the batteries around in the remote. Took my brother in law[sic] several days to figure it out." - Reddit u/SteevyT

They say revenge stinks.

When JaGuido was in college, they came home to their dorm room to find a pile of shaving cream left at the entrance. When they discovered who'd pulled the prank, they went to the assailant's dorm, unscrewed their peephole, and unloaded two full cans of Febreeze inside.

The stuff that supervillains are made of.

Unsplash | Lee Jiyong

"My company has a password policy that locks your account after 3 wrong password attempts. A few times when someone irritates me I'll lock my computer, switch user, and enter their username with a wrong password 3 times so they get locked out." - Reddit u/Nicky4Pin

They are justly served.

Unsplash | Noah Buscher

Reddit user TheToenailCollector kept having her lunch stolen at work. One day, her husband decided to mix a couple of laxatives into her bottle of Gatorade. Before the day was done, it became painfully obvious as to who the thief was.

Never mess with an English teacher.

Unsplash | Romain Dancre

"My mum and her friend had a massive fight, and my mum's friend sent a letter to my mum scolding her and pretty much saying "We're no longer friends" and my mum, as an Ex-Teacher, took out a red pen, corrected all the spelling mistakes and grammatical mistakes, and mailed it right back to her." - Reddit u/YourApril27

h/y: Reddit