12+ Hilarious Amazon Reviews That Deserve An Award

A great geft fer berfdaes!

Ahh, the perfect crime. Well, unless you buy this amazingly reliable product! Looks directly into camera and raises product up to eye level.

Screams In Penguin!

Never before has the phrase "interlocking silencer" been used in such a frankly ludicrous sentence.

I review this review 5/5, would laugh until I fart loudly again.

I think I've also seen that final line used as review of someone's Tinder profile.

Next time you're on holiday moaning about the amount of selfie sticks (and believe you me, I've moaned more than most) just think that those little crap sticks helped this one wholesome man take the best picture of himself in 60 years!

I particularly like that because they had to verify their purchase, the review still describes the lump of clay as being the S10 model in Prism Black with 128 GB storage. Truly, the things they can do with clay these days.

All joking aside, anyone who has ever spent any time in one of these things will know how massively uncomfortable they are. I remember thinking it would be a good idea to go as BoJack Horseman to a halloween party in one of these. Ten minutes of being there and I realised I had made a huge mistake.

Are you tired of arguing about things like who's using the charger? Well, thanks to this 4 port charger, you can get back to arguing about crippling alcoholism and unrequited celebrity crushes in no time!

Knowing my granddad, there actually would be complaints. Not even death would be able to get in the way of him and sending something back!

I can safely say that I would also give this review "0/10, Would not picture again!"

Disclaimer: Snorkel and goggles not included.

The mental image of this is bad enough alone, let alone imagining the sensation.

Image the state an iceam cream sandwich that size would be in by the time it arrived!

There are a surprising amount of these that revolve around the wellbeing of people's mother-in-laws which is quite concerning.

I do not, I repeat do not, want to know how they managed to incorporate something of that shape and function into sex.

You know that anything that starts with the phrase "As a non-lactating male" is going somewhere strange.

Personally, I don't think there's ever been a more perfect situation to use a plethora of kazoos than while drowning out Westboro Baptist Church protesters. 5/5 stars is accurate.

Maybe this wasn't exactly what they thought they would find, but clearly this is one satisfied customer. Now they know exactly what's been going on upstairs. Unrelated, but does Amazon offer exorcism kits?

If I ever made myself a waffle keyboard, I know for a fact that I, too, would spend the entire day admiring its deliciousness on my desk without getting a single bit of work done. So anyone who wants to purchase this product, be warned: with great power comes great responsibility.

Anyone else imagining this person vibrating on the spot with the sweet, sweet buzz of caffeine coursing hotly through their veins? Same. And I'm actually a little jealous that's not me.

I actually have this tool too, and while attempting to cut the tag off a shirt,I blacked out. When I woke up, I discovered had somehow managed to install a brand new kitchen for my mom, complete with stainless steel appliances, marble tile, and heated floors. Wild.

I am outraged and frankly, I just hope everyone reads these reviews so they don't make the same mistake.

Honestly, while this television is hilariously overpriced, I basically have the same reaction whenever I buy anything over $20. Except food, that never seems to faze me.

Honestly, I wouldn't worry too much about this. It's just an exhaust pipe cover, right? What's the worst that could happen?

We've all heard horror stories about black lights and hotel rooms, but I think in this case, I think ignorance is bliss.

Does that answer your question? Yeah, it's that silent.

Personally, I think the whole "I can read minds" pro makes this whole experience totally worth it. So you have a few jitters, so what? So you can't feel your face, so what? You can read minds.

I'm just happy this person was able to DIY themselves an actual tent when this $349 one failed them.

That's one way to make sure no one sits next to you on the bus. Other options include blowing your nose into your hands, opening a container of particularly pungent fish, or wearing a MAGA hat.

This is poetry in motion, people. And I trust that the missing star is due to the unfortunate realization the scale helped this person come to and is not a comment on its effectiveness.

Personally, I'm far more interested in finding out more about this yodeling pickle than I am in listening to anything Just Bieber ever puts out. And that is a fact.

While I'm not sure this reviewer's speculation is entirely accurate, it is hilarious and definitely brings into question just what exactly happened to the teddy before shipping. The people want to know, Amazon.

This person knows exactly what to write to spark intrigue in consumers. Perhaps they should considering going into the marketing business?

I'd call that money well spent, wouldn't you? Sounds like this sticker has changed some lives, and I'm definitely interested in seeing how it'll change mine.

This reviewer was happy to let people know that the rice cooker works as advertised. It does, indeed, cook rice. And really, that's all we need it to do for us. 5/5 stars.

Sometimes couples just drift apart over time, sometimes the spark just inexplicably dies, and sometimes your wife buys a Cricut Explore Air 2 Mint DIY Cutting Machine. It's a tale as old as time.

h/t: Bored Panda

Do you want to know about lighter fluid? Do you want a review for lighter fluid? Then this is the lighter fluid review for you.

I mean, it might not be the testimonial they were looking for, but it's still pretty good!